Last night, we explored through a series of workshop exercises, the reality of Romania during 1989 and what it might have been like living in an oppressive environment with a society ripe for change and revolution. Afterwhich, I went home and as I sat down with my family for dinner/supper, news of demonstrations in Myanmar flashed across the television screen. I found myself riveted at images of monks and protestors marching, all hoping for change. The news commentator warned of possible reprisals from the military government. I found myself drawing correlations between the protests in Myanmar and the world of revolutionary Romania. The reasons for change are similar and the reaction of authorities also mirror revolutions from history. With so many similarities, I thought about the different individuals who are caught up in the protests in Myanmar now and wondered if the characters that I play in Mad Forest are somehow among the protestors currently on the streets. The specifics or country, race, religion, culture, etc. might not be there, but as humans, our reactions would probably be the same.
My contemplations then went back to an exercise that we did. In the exercise, we took to the streets of Little India (specifically Buffalo Road) and under the curious gaze of tourists and passersby, I discovered that I (and my character) could do almost anything for self preservation - including getting someone else into trouble. With that knowledge, how then would I react when I see thousands of people on the streets, marching for change? Would self preservation overcome the desire for change? What would it take to join those lines of people? The exploration continues...
And as my dinner/supper came to an end, I had a thought of how far removed my reality is from that of Myanmar or Romania. The exploration continues indeed...
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
the romanian research wall goes up....
Creating a world for a play involves a tremendous effort of immersion from the actors (and everyone else of course), and when I act, I've always found it useful to surround myself with images and objects evocative of the world i'm trying to channel for the audience. Its amazing what a photo or a piece of text, a map or an artifact can do - just as a trigger, an inspiration, an evocation, a piece of background, a borrowed memory, or just an after-image in the eye...
so to begin bridging the gulf between 2007 Singapore and 1989 Romania, the imaging begins .....
R.E.S.P.E.C.T.
It is the second week into rehearsals. Lucia is taking shape. I've given her a voice and, hopefully by next month, a distinct physicality that's not Daphne's autopilot.
The trouble is, I still can't seem to find much to respect about her. I didn't like her from the moment I first read the play and certainly have never respected her. She is a self-centred, practically amoral young twerp who just wants out, and has no problem causing hurt to her loved ones. I identify with very little in her.
The way I feel about young Lucia is obviously not good for my character journey, and Jon has suggested I find *something* to respect or admire about her. Her strength of will, perhaps - she is a very strong character, for sure. Her determination too, perhaps, which redeems her a little in the last act.
You see, people can have these admirable qualities and still be completely unlikeable leeches. It'll be a while before I come close to respecting Lucia.
Here's the irony - Lucia was one of the more popular characters that more people had requested to play, but I was cast in the role even though I hadn't requested it.
Less than three months to go...
The trouble is, I still can't seem to find much to respect about her. I didn't like her from the moment I first read the play and certainly have never respected her. She is a self-centred, practically amoral young twerp who just wants out, and has no problem causing hurt to her loved ones. I identify with very little in her.
The way I feel about young Lucia is obviously not good for my character journey, and Jon has suggested I find *something* to respect or admire about her. Her strength of will, perhaps - she is a very strong character, for sure. Her determination too, perhaps, which redeems her a little in the last act.
You see, people can have these admirable qualities and still be completely unlikeable leeches. It'll be a while before I come close to respecting Lucia.
Here's the irony - Lucia was one of the more popular characters that more people had requested to play, but I was cast in the role even though I hadn't requested it.
Less than three months to go...
Sunday, September 16, 2007
The Director thinks....
Peter Brook in "The Golden Fish" tells us that "Political oppression has always paid theatre its greatest compliment. In countries under the rule of fear, the theatre is the form which dictators watch closely and dread the most. For this reason, the greater our freedom, the more we ourselves must understand and discipline every act of theatre : to have meaning it must obey very precise rules."
There is freedom enough these days in Singapore theatre, but have we learned to wield it well ? Ah.
The same applies to a play or a scene - the Mad Forest offers us so much room and so many options - but there is a clear path that we must discern, a path marked by strong and trustworthy markers. It is along this path that the audience can best follow us, and on that path that we can choose to run,walk,stand still,set up camp, or simply stray from briefly knowing its there to return to...
In the first few rehearsals, it has been intriguing to see how easily the old traps and tricks can emerge and carve misleading paths through each scene. Prior assumptions, sentimental viewings, anticipated endings - all these things throw us off so easily. Not to menton acting habits.
Its Young & W!LD's second show - the greatest challenge will be to make this rehearsal process a new adventure, a deeper exploration of actor potential - and NOT a repeat of the last processes, just chipping away at the same old habits that were addressed the last time. Let's not repeat old lessons, but move on to deeper ones... This is what they mean when they speak of actors growing (or not growing) from show to show - the ability to approach each new rehearsal process readier, freer, more open abd quicker to adapt than before. Its not easy - habits are deeply ingrained - but it takes the actor's mighty act of both will and surrender - will to not be 'safe' and easy, surrender to the totally new experience this new play offers...
onwards and upwards...
There is freedom enough these days in Singapore theatre, but have we learned to wield it well ? Ah.
The same applies to a play or a scene - the Mad Forest offers us so much room and so many options - but there is a clear path that we must discern, a path marked by strong and trustworthy markers. It is along this path that the audience can best follow us, and on that path that we can choose to run,walk,stand still,set up camp, or simply stray from briefly knowing its there to return to...
In the first few rehearsals, it has been intriguing to see how easily the old traps and tricks can emerge and carve misleading paths through each scene. Prior assumptions, sentimental viewings, anticipated endings - all these things throw us off so easily. Not to menton acting habits.
Its Young & W!LD's second show - the greatest challenge will be to make this rehearsal process a new adventure, a deeper exploration of actor potential - and NOT a repeat of the last processes, just chipping away at the same old habits that were addressed the last time. Let's not repeat old lessons, but move on to deeper ones... This is what they mean when they speak of actors growing (or not growing) from show to show - the ability to approach each new rehearsal process readier, freer, more open abd quicker to adapt than before. Its not easy - habits are deeply ingrained - but it takes the actor's mighty act of both will and surrender - will to not be 'safe' and easy, surrender to the totally new experience this new play offers...
onwards and upwards...
Thoughts on last Monday -Terence
I served the country between the 3rd to the 14th of Sept by attending my reservist training. I am an NS man, meaning I have finished my 2 and a half years of active service with the Singapore Army years ago, and it is stipulated that I return to training every year for a maximum of 40 days, depending on what my battalion or brigade requires. Thus far, as is the norm, we return once a year for one to two weeks, and will be doing so for another 5 or 6 years. I believe in the system and am dedicated to it, perhaps more so than the others. I do not believe that makes me a patriot to any extent, simply that I have a home and people here I hope to protect.
I returned to my bunk, having been to a workshop at 27 Kerbau; I had a night's off, since we had completed our tasks and had several hours of free time before needing to sleep at about 2300hrs. I left the group of actors at about 10.10, in the midst of the discussion we had on the exercise conducted minutes earlier, and arrived at camp on the dot, 10.30pm, which was the time we were supposed to return to camp by. It was from one exercise to another.
When I was proposed an angle for my blog entries, to think if there were aspects of Radu that could be discovered while serving my nation, amongst other views, I thought there wouldn't be anything I could find. Because I can and I do believe in serving my country, in spite of what I feel about its government, in spite of the fact that I too, to a lesser extent, have to be careful with the words I am presenting in this public space, i.e., I have chosen NOT to state what it is I feel about this country's government for the sake of this group of ours.
But there are several things I do not understand about my character, Radu. This country's army isn't independent of the government, so while I may feel whatever it is a feel about the gahmen, I still am, in a way, supporting it by giving it my service to the best of my ability. I would want to, perhaps, actually stand up to support what I believed in, but how does one actually know such things?
During the workshop, we were walked through years of repression, not necessarily as Romanians nor with any specificity to our characters, and were allowed to experience, imaginatively, how it was to feel numb. Eventually, two of us broke into a scuffle, myself and Jonathan Lum, because he wanted food and I wanted to make a statement. I won that fight, but I lost terribly - because I did not have the support of the people I was fighting for. I was seen as being selfish, and unconcerned to the needs of the others, and the others did not understand what I was trying to do; they felt I was acting hero. And they were right. What were my/my character's intentions? How much of it was for them, and how much of it was for me, my ego and my character's?
In the heat of the discussion I had to go, without fully explaining myself to the others, not that it matters now, with my thoughts and feelings bruised. But I felt so alive, and I resented having to leave. We did experience something close to a revolution, at least, closer than what one normally gets in this country, and I believed that was what Radu looked for, and perhaps some of the other characters as well. Because what they had was youth, or whatever else was left of it, and they didn't want it squandered away. Not on mundanity, when there was something else out there, better, that they could almost grasp, and they had the ability to do so.
I did not despise the army for taking me away from that revolution, it cannot serve my every need. But I certainly did not enjoy returning to a place devoid of the action I felt in 27. And who could I talk to about these things, apart from my fellow actors who were there?
I returned to my bunk, having been to a workshop at 27 Kerbau; I had a night's off, since we had completed our tasks and had several hours of free time before needing to sleep at about 2300hrs. I left the group of actors at about 10.10, in the midst of the discussion we had on the exercise conducted minutes earlier, and arrived at camp on the dot, 10.30pm, which was the time we were supposed to return to camp by. It was from one exercise to another.
When I was proposed an angle for my blog entries, to think if there were aspects of Radu that could be discovered while serving my nation, amongst other views, I thought there wouldn't be anything I could find. Because I can and I do believe in serving my country, in spite of what I feel about its government, in spite of the fact that I too, to a lesser extent, have to be careful with the words I am presenting in this public space, i.e., I have chosen NOT to state what it is I feel about this country's government for the sake of this group of ours.
But there are several things I do not understand about my character, Radu. This country's army isn't independent of the government, so while I may feel whatever it is a feel about the gahmen, I still am, in a way, supporting it by giving it my service to the best of my ability. I would want to, perhaps, actually stand up to support what I believed in, but how does one actually know such things?
During the workshop, we were walked through years of repression, not necessarily as Romanians nor with any specificity to our characters, and were allowed to experience, imaginatively, how it was to feel numb. Eventually, two of us broke into a scuffle, myself and Jonathan Lum, because he wanted food and I wanted to make a statement. I won that fight, but I lost terribly - because I did not have the support of the people I was fighting for. I was seen as being selfish, and unconcerned to the needs of the others, and the others did not understand what I was trying to do; they felt I was acting hero. And they were right. What were my/my character's intentions? How much of it was for them, and how much of it was for me, my ego and my character's?
In the heat of the discussion I had to go, without fully explaining myself to the others, not that it matters now, with my thoughts and feelings bruised. But I felt so alive, and I resented having to leave. We did experience something close to a revolution, at least, closer than what one normally gets in this country, and I believed that was what Radu looked for, and perhaps some of the other characters as well. Because what they had was youth, or whatever else was left of it, and they didn't want it squandered away. Not on mundanity, when there was something else out there, better, that they could almost grasp, and they had the ability to do so.
I did not despise the army for taking me away from that revolution, it cannot serve my every need. But I certainly did not enjoy returning to a place devoid of the action I felt in 27. And who could I talk to about these things, apart from my fellow actors who were there?
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Thoughts on Flavia Antonescu
I read the character of Flavia at the initial read of the script and was instantly excited by the character. A subsequent, more careful reading of the play in my own time only deepened my desire to play the role, and I was happy to be told by our director that I was indeed cast as Flavia opposite Jonathan Lum as Mihai, Flavia's husband, and Terence Tan as Radu, their son.
When I was rehearsing for On North Diversion Road, young 'n' W!LD's debut production in June, one note from director Jonathan Lim that kept echoing in my head was simply this, "Don't cope. Suffer."
It is conflict, both internal and external, that lies at the core of theatre. We have to remind ourselves that our instincts as human beings often need to be put aside in the rehearsal room and onstage.
The character of Flavia gives ample opportunities to "suffer". On the surface, she is the thoroughly respectable, dignified wife and mother of the rather well-off, intellectual Antonescu family, comprising an architect, a teacher and an art student. Her family, to all appearances is doing well under the Ceausescu regime.
But privately, Flavia is just barely getting by from day to day. Even as she toes the party line and dutifully preaches state propaganda to her students, inwardly she hopes for change, for freedom. Emotionally, she is so cut off from her husband and son that she confides only in her dead grandmother.
As the play progresses, Flavia's struggle to bridge the chasm between her private ideals and her practical day-to-day reality becomes increasingly acute, and as her husband and son retreat further from her, we truly wonder how much longer Flavia can preserve even the illusion of coping.
In other words, from an actor's point of view, what a fantastic character to get to play!
My first rehearsal takes place tomorrow night, and I can't wait to plunge in.
When I was rehearsing for On North Diversion Road, young 'n' W!LD's debut production in June, one note from director Jonathan Lim that kept echoing in my head was simply this, "Don't cope. Suffer."
It is conflict, both internal and external, that lies at the core of theatre. We have to remind ourselves that our instincts as human beings often need to be put aside in the rehearsal room and onstage.
The character of Flavia gives ample opportunities to "suffer". On the surface, she is the thoroughly respectable, dignified wife and mother of the rather well-off, intellectual Antonescu family, comprising an architect, a teacher and an art student. Her family, to all appearances is doing well under the Ceausescu regime.
But privately, Flavia is just barely getting by from day to day. Even as she toes the party line and dutifully preaches state propaganda to her students, inwardly she hopes for change, for freedom. Emotionally, she is so cut off from her husband and son that she confides only in her dead grandmother.
As the play progresses, Flavia's struggle to bridge the chasm between her private ideals and her practical day-to-day reality becomes increasingly acute, and as her husband and son retreat further from her, we truly wonder how much longer Flavia can preserve even the illusion of coping.
In other words, from an actor's point of view, what a fantastic character to get to play!
My first rehearsal takes place tomorrow night, and I can't wait to plunge in.
Thursday, September 6, 2007
Designing Mad Forest is Crazy!
I have to admit that coming up with a design for Mad Forest has not been easy (and to juggle between that, school, work, motorbike and researching for my characterS). Life is great!
Initial ideas was to come up with an image to capture what the revolution meant. Think about freedom. Think about oppression. So I was looking at some photos yar, and there was an image of a young man with the romanian flag in his right arm. His left arm was punching the air above him in a clenched fist. It's as if he is proclaiming victory for being able to free himself from something. The image causes your eyes to be directed from bottom to top of the picture and it gives you that optimistic feeling. So, i tried to draw him.
Some of the guys I showed it to, liked it. But try to imagine the image and the texts "Mad Forest" at the bottom... You know what I mean?
I don't think I would want to use this image. Besides, it is quite poorly drawn.
I realised that it is important for the visual image of "Mad Forest" to serve as the link between the title (Mad Forest) and what the play is about (revolution, freedom, oppression, violence, hope? and etc) So we discussed it after the first read and we came up with a pretty cool idea. Won't show it to you because I wanted it to be a surprise.
So back to my drawing board! Actually, that's not quite true. I don't have a drawing board. But you know what I mean.
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
It is our first read-through of Mad Forest, or at least mine since I’d missed the first session (was away at the time).
Upon hearing the casting choices, I find it odd that I’ve been assigned what was one of the roles that more people had requested – odd in that I hadn’t requested it at all. Besides, it is a character I’d found rather flighty and self-absorbed when reading the play on my own previously, and one that I don’t particularly respect. Oh well. If anything, this will be an interesting journey.
The first act is being read through a tad disappointingly, I think. Rather blandly. Sure enough, directorial feedback reflects this sentiment. The second acts shifts up one gear, and I don’t realise we’re in third gear until the end of the act, and I’ve found myself leaning forward in my seat, even though my part in this act is close to nonexistent. The third act doesn’t up the gear – instead, the vehicle starts to drive on ice. Near the end, everyone is concentrating hard to avoid complete confusion and chaos.
At the end of the night, when I’m already in the quiet confines of home, it occurs to me that that read-through was more than the awkward fumblings of a first read. We had reflected the moods and shades of the play: almost bland tidiness, the gradual shaking of foundations, chaos.
In spite of knowing the immense character journey I am beginning to undertake, my worries of this first night are obsessions with:
Smoking. I will have to learn to smoke. I’d always turned my nose at smoking based on strong principle. This time, I will have to be a whore for the art.
The accent, the accent. The only reference I can think of is The Count from Sesame Street. “One! Wah hahaha! Two! Wah hahaha!”
Three months suddenly seems a very short time.
Upon hearing the casting choices, I find it odd that I’ve been assigned what was one of the roles that more people had requested – odd in that I hadn’t requested it at all. Besides, it is a character I’d found rather flighty and self-absorbed when reading the play on my own previously, and one that I don’t particularly respect. Oh well. If anything, this will be an interesting journey.
The first act is being read through a tad disappointingly, I think. Rather blandly. Sure enough, directorial feedback reflects this sentiment. The second acts shifts up one gear, and I don’t realise we’re in third gear until the end of the act, and I’ve found myself leaning forward in my seat, even though my part in this act is close to nonexistent. The third act doesn’t up the gear – instead, the vehicle starts to drive on ice. Near the end, everyone is concentrating hard to avoid complete confusion and chaos.
At the end of the night, when I’m already in the quiet confines of home, it occurs to me that that read-through was more than the awkward fumblings of a first read. We had reflected the moods and shades of the play: almost bland tidiness, the gradual shaking of foundations, chaos.
In spite of knowing the immense character journey I am beginning to undertake, my worries of this first night are obsessions with:
Smoking. I will have to learn to smoke. I’d always turned my nose at smoking based on strong principle. This time, I will have to be a whore for the art.
The accent, the accent. The only reference I can think of is The Count from Sesame Street. “One! Wah hahaha! Two! Wah hahaha!”
Three months suddenly seems a very short time.
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